Tahlequah Daily Press

Sports

November 30, 2012

Arkansas coaching search gets weird

On some levels I can relate to John L. Smith’s plight.

Much like Smith, my employer recently made a personnel decision that directly impacted my workload. Like Smith, I went from merely setting a kick return unit, to calling plays, barking orders, and attempting to figure out what’s going on inside Paul Petrino’s head.

Of course, there are discrepancies. I didn’t high-five the Weber State Press before performing an about face in pursuit of greener pastures — I just moved down the hall. Smith’s pay increase was quite a bit larger than mine — yet, my debt to income ratio is far more favorable. My Paul Petrino looks nothing like his Paul Petrino, though he/she is equally frustrating to work with — and I am sure far more demonstrative.

The point is, however, such routine-altering changes — especially changes for which the individual is ill-prepared — can make a person crazy; crazy enough to forget the name of the state in which they reside, crazy enough to demand inappropriate smiles from those around them.

Fortunately, I’ve yet to completely flip my lid. Contrarily, I actually enjoy my added responsibilities, both for the modest entertainment value, and for the résumé enhancement. I have, to my knowledge, managed to avoid infuriating multiple area codes, and Les Miles has not been approached as my potential replacement.

The only element of my newfound circumstances that may be considered disadvantageous is the impediment that the increased burden has placed on my ability to consistently churn out a column. In fact, since earning said promotion, I have failed to produce a single by-line; a statistic that I am not proud of. For that, I apologize.

The plan, as of now, is to work this new gimmick that I originally intended to call, “Three-Point Stance.” Catchy, right? That is, until I remembered that my column was once referred to as “Paxton’s Point After,” and during last season’s NBA Playoffs we already played on that whole three points thing. Then, this fall, the idea was to write a column called “Four Quarters,” with one quarter dedicated to each of the four FBS universities in our coverage area. Sorry about that, Tulsa.

The point is, it’s a played out idea, and I’m no good at adhering to it. So here’s the deal: Some weeks you’ll get three points, some you’ll get one, or two, or five. It’s a surprise. You’re welcome.

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